When I Grow Up, I Want to be a Successful Matchmaker

What do you want to be when you grow up?

I always wanted to be a Writer. But I was too shy to admit that out loud as a kid, so I said things that made WAY more sense, such as, “When I grow up, I want to be an Exercise Teacher.”

No, I did not. I just figured that was the “right” answer. And it was a lot less embarrassing than the truth, which was that I wanted to be a Writer.

But the truth doesn’t end there.

There was one more thing I’ve always wanted to be: a Matchmaker.

When I was in grade two, I remember carefully studying my class picture, thinking of all the excellent couples I could create, if only people would just LISTEN to me.

Fast forward to today: I’ve still not set up one successful couple. Not even one. I’m terrible at this.

Which is kind of weird, because I myself am successfully matched…perhaps so well-matched that I just don’t have any residual success left to put toward the successful setting-up of any other couple. Who knows.

I’d long given up hope, when one day I stumbled across a TV show wherein singles were set up on a bunch of blind dates all at the same time, at the same restaurant, at a specific time. If dinner went well, they’d exchange info and take it from there…or choose to never see each other again.

I thought to myself, “HEY! I could do that!” I was super-inspired.

But first I need people to match up together.

Um…if you’re single, would YOU care to be matched up by Mennotoba?

My first fear is that there will be some people I cannot find matches for. My second fear is that some people will hate whomever I match them with and resent me deeply for my ineptitude (this has actually happened to me before…I TOLD you I kinda suck at this). My third fear is that I will turn out to be awesome at this and regret not charging for my matchmaking talents.

So maybe let’s say this: if you’re open to being set up with someone, send me an email at realmennotoba@gmail.com

The subject line should be something about “Mennotoba Matchmaking”.

I may not respond at all. Or worse, I may respond and it’ll all go horribly wrong.

OR it all go wonderfully and my dream of being a successful matchmaker will come true and this will be Manitoba’s best springtime YAT!